Dear friends and family,
We pray everyone is staying safe and healthy! A couple of weeks ago, Gina and I linked up with Gil & Brenda Stuart, good friends and excellent people specializing in blended family situations, to be a guest speaker on their podcast. They have written Restored and Remarried: Encouragement For Remarried Couples in a Step Family, an amazing resource for blended families. You can find out more about them at GilandBrenda.com!
Gil and Brenda Stuart, renowned counselors for blended families.
Six key points from the podcast:
1. Remember to STOP and PRAY before acting. Too often we get ahead of ourselves and want to act or react as soon as possible. Be cautious and prudent, realizing there are other pieces of the puzzle that need to be considered. Take comfort in knowing it’s not all about you.
2. It takes others to rebuild relationships. Don’t be afraid to reach out for outside help. There’s no shame to get counseling to heal deep rooted wounds. Be sure to have a solid support system. Join a bible study and gain a mentor, someone to help guide you using the Word and biblical wisdom. Be wary of isolation, as the enemy enjoys pity parties and self-deprecation. A perfect, tweet-worthy quote from Gil: “Isolation is the enemy of restoration”.
3. Don’t give up when you meet opposition. The enemy would love nothing more than to get in the middle of your marriage and create turmoil. Remember this fact when you meet opposition from an ex-spouse, your own step kids, or anyone else.
4. Things take TIME to fall into place. It is said that it takes seven years (7!) for a blended family to integrate. What makes up the most of that time frame is making mistakes and recovering from them. It’s natural to make mistakes along the way, so don’t beat yourself up too much. However, make sure to acknowledge and apologize and KEEP MOVING FORWARD.
5. Keep the kids in mind. Remember their perspective. Sacrifice and surrender for the good of the kids. Don’t diminish their problems as not “real life” issues, as they are very much real to them. Listen to their thoughts and feelings and try not to react – just listen and be a soundboard, bouncing back what they are communicating to you.
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We always pray this over you: “May the Lord bless you and protect you. May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you. May the Lord show you his favor and give you his peace.” (Numbers 6:24-26)
Making the family WHOLE again,
We love to hear your stories. If you have a story where the resources of Blended Together Forever has helped you, a member of your family, a family in you community, we would love to hear it. Send us a note to info@blendedtogether.org
We have been so blessed by this opportunity to serve God through Blended Together Forever. We pray that you will continue to financially support this ministry with your generous donations. You can use the link below to donate to Blended Together Forever.